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I met a new face to the pick up community, BradP a master pick up artist. I have mad props for this guy, as he embodies the mindset of the man who owns every situation and always has fun.

I went to one of his seminars as he came to my lair and I was able to see him talk, give his mantra and after seeing him talk and interact with us, it clicked. This guy had the attitude of someone who was always in a fun, confident, playful, leading, authoritative mood. Now, I can’t say this guy is like this all the time because I’m not with him 24/7, but here is what clicked.

When you open a set, do you go in already happy, excited, with the mindset that you WILL pick up these girls; and if it doesn’t work out, it’s because they are crazy or you tripped on your shoelace one-too-many times? (Or maybe not sarging, but even in any social setting talking to anyone)

This is the frame I am talking about. The frame that EVERYONE will love you when you meet them, so you might as well be having a good time: class-mates, co-workers, teachers, friends, family, neighbors, and girls. Now if everyone loves you, its like hanging out with your favorite buddies that you always are loud and laughing with… why not make that into everyone? And if the other person isn’t cool enough to hang with you, filter them!

My Masochist must die… here is what I mean by masochist. Masochist means someone who receives pleasure by receiving punishment—I don’t mean that in a perverted way. I mean it like when I am at the gym and I am running for 10 minutes, I convince myself I am very tired so I get off the machine; once I am off the machine I feel pleasure for relieving myself… however at the end of the day I have not gotten any more cut.

Also, when I am in bed in the morning, after waking up, and I need to get up I sometimes still lay in bed till it is the exact last minute. Then I slowly stumble out of bed still. This is masochistic because I give in to the pleasure of lying in bed for 10 extra minutes while I still suffer the punishment of being late.

This is indirect, it’s not like I punish myself by stepping on needles or anything. It’s what Anodea Judith also calls The Endurer in her excellent book “Eastern Body Western Mind” The Endurer allows himself to go through needless pleasure.

I realize that the way I use masochistic is different than most (it seems more like laziness), but I don’t think there is any other word for what I am trying to say because I am talking about something deeper than laziness, something that is always in my way when I want to accomplish something. So this is a slightly skewed interpretation of Masochism is used here.

Anyway, my goal now is to suppress that feeling/voice which makes me imagine I am tired when I have only been on the treadmill for 10 minutes, when I eat too much, when I sleep too much, when I drink too much, when I spend too much money, when I lay in bed too much, when I am quiet too much. Even when someone is taking up too much of my time/energy I can feel guilty about not telling them I need to go, when I try to avoid someone who is harmless, when I procrastinate my personal and academic studies, when I get restless while reading or studying… et cetera.

Dr. Paul says the Boy must die, more specifically I say the masochist must die. The little part of our brain that likes to be in the comfort zone all the time must die. I will live at the edge, as David Dieda discusses in “Way of the Superior Man”, live at the edge where comfort meets fear.

I am not hero worshiping, but I want that attitude BradP had. I can’t be a BradP, Mystery, TylerD, but I can observer that they seem always “on”, always in a good mood (although in Style’s “The Game” you see that isn’t quite true for Mystery or TylerD), but my point is when I go out to have fun, the masochist which gives me my lazy, comfort zone addicted behaviors is dead now. It is breathing its last breath. I will always be on and I will like it, I will love it!


God I enjoyed writing this post!

Posted by BigSend on Saturday, September 23, 2006 at 9/23/2006 11:48:00 PM | Permalink