I Feel there is more than just seeing the Social Matrix
To me, the social matrix is just social understanding, it is not a place When I used to go out and socialize a few years ago (before the In other words, in the past I was blind to the "social matrix" because Again these are just observations, every couple is different. So..! Now what?? Now that I can see this "Matrix", now what? Yes, I can My problem is still there, I am still in my own head. I met a new friend in the community named Jungle---hes a cool dude into I told him, almost word for word, that I see something---whether or not Wow, this is exactly what I needed, I never even realized it was a So many times I'd be in field, interacting with friends, new My conclusion, as of now, is that when we see this social matrix we have I'm not sure why Jungle decided to have this conversation with me (I'm I feel this comes down to David DeAngelo's "Plan, Do, Study, Act" Beautiful---its been 2 years since I thought of that sequence and only To finish off, PlayboyLA made a post somewhere that if a person is using
to be nor does it have any direct benefits necessarily. If I recall, it
was Ranko "Shark" who popularized the idea of the Social Matrix and also
TylerDruden who wrote posts talking about the secret society of people
who were "in" this social matrix. "To understand the social matrix is to
understand the social world on a level above, like 'The Matrix' the
movie analogy" I feel that though this is true, it isn't the final
solution to understanding women and dating.
community) I would see a guy and girl holding hands and get jealous. I
would see a group of girls walk by and feel a rush of anxiety spike
through my stomach. What would go through my head were thoughts like
"man, how did he find love" or "those girls are bitches, fucking sluts"
Now when I see a guy and girl holding hands, I can tell who is leading
the interaction---sometimes I can tell the guy doesn't really want to
hold hands but he's doing it out of some kind of obligation. Now when I
see a group of girls walk by, invariably 99% of them seem insecure, eyes
darting back and forth sometimes, walking tightly with each other or
laughing hysterically at something.
of my insecurities, jealousies, and pessimism. Now, I feel much more
objective. Instead of seeing a group of girls walk by and become
intimidated, I just observe them and see them as individuals for who
they really are---humans. I don't often see couples walking together
that look truly happy, smiling, and loving---lots of times I see a guy
getting his hand held by his girlfriend, going somewhere without much
emotion on his face.
tell when a girl is giving me subtle IOIs, IODs, tests, batting her hair
at me, looking deep in my eyes, or not.
music, DJing and sound quality perfection. He too has been in the
community for about 3 years. Me him and Ulysses were chilling and
planning a night of some boozing, chips, dip, poker, and hookah---a
sarge free night. I went to the market to get chips and dip with Jungle
when he asked me something kind of out of the blue---do you see the
social matrix? I forgot why he asked but that may not matter, it was a
question I hadn't thought of yet, just something that has gradually
developed.
it is the "true" social matrix I'm not sure, but I definitely can see
into interactions on a deeper level than I could before. Then, and I'm
not sure why, Jungle told me that he does too and he is trying to stop
seeing it (or stop thinking about it---I hope I'm not misquoting too bad).
thing. I thought I was better than my AFC self, truth is I am still
using the same part of my brain which ran my "AFCness" but now a
different thought processes. And that is the solution---the thought
process. GET OUT OF OUR FUCKING HEADS AND GET INTO OUR BODY!
acquaintances, talking with classmates, teachers, anyone and I would see
their micro-facial expressions, feel their vibes, and think about them.
Although it is true, calibration is about socializing on the same
frequency as everyone else, there is a fine line between seeing a girl
give you an IOD and thinking "it is over" or seeing an IOI and thinking
"I got her in my pocket!" (However, the latter is positive thinking, but
sometimes it has made me a bit delusional and I'd not make a move at the
right time and the line would go slack, or vice versa and seem desperate).
to just feel it. We can't allow ourselves to think about it while in
field (interacting or anything) we have to just feel it. When we feel an
IOD, that means we back peddle and keep being ourselves, not contemplate
it. When we get an IOI, we don't stop like a deer in the headlights, nor
do we celebrate.. just be cool, feel it and know that what we are doing
now is working! [this would have come into play real well on my last
date on Friday].
know he had some other reason, I just forgot it) what I got out of the
conversation was the realization that almost nothing had changed, I was
still in my head. My first New Years Resolution is to focus on being in
the Now moment, and not thinking unless A) I am doing homework/studying
B) Contemplating a problem after the fact C) something along those lines
haha
sequence. That is, we plan what we want to go (sarge, meet women), we do
it (go out and just do it---not think and contemplate, but just do it
naturally), study what happen (now we can think and ask friends, post
online, figure out what went right and what went wrong), then we act on
our new understandings and repeat the new Plan... [personally, I think
'Act' should be replaced with 'Implement and Repeat']
now do I really understand it.
the same AFC part of their brain to become a PUA, they will be
fundamentally flawed. We have to bring out our newer, better self that
doesn't work with AFC hardware---this means changing from the inside
out, not outside in.
.
