http://bigsendworld.com

I got a hold of Deep Inner Game by Dr. Paul and DeAngelo: http://simurl.com/deep_inner_game

This is a 7 DVD set and I got through half of it and yes it is genius. The program (so far) is just focused on Dr. Paul's MindOS machine. Since I already read MindOS, the eBook, I realize the first half is just Dr. Paul's MindOS put in terms of dating. I swear, Dr. Paul's material has the answer to every fucking inner-game "psychological" problem. It is just all mapped out. I can take any problem of mine and break that problem into parts and solve them using MindOS.

Dr. Paul has an "anxiety map" and an "anger map". Anxiety and Anger are not "bad" states, they are natural emotional states every person has. They occur when "something" has gotten under our "skin". Part of MindOS is explaining all the possibilities Anger and Anxiety can lead. Anger doesn't not mean "aggression" --- anger is just the "energy" or "momentum" which can lead to aggression. Dr. Paul teaches of BETTER means to deal with Anger (and equally genius means in dealing with Anxiety).

I imagine every one of you who is not already familiar with MindOS is 100% confused. Its a lot to explain, I really do suggest buying his book or Deep Inner Game (Linked to the left)

Since these ideas do have a copyright hanging off of them, I can't give away everything---I'll just be asked to remove the information. I can say that everyone can make a choice (as we all have FREEDOM of choice..perhaps) to decide what they can do with their anger and anxiety. We can choose to be violent, or we can choose to be assertive with out anger. We could choose to be narcissistic with out anxiety, or we can choose to face our fears.

The choice is ours, the path is ours---Dr. Paul does BY FAR the best job of relating all these complex ideas into one theory. (He calls this theory the unification theory of psychology).

Dr. Paul went deep into relationships and dating in this D.I.G. program. Taking a step back for a moment, I already saw a speaking by Zan a few weeks ago on his relationship frame. Zan is one of the Dating Gurus and he had some amazing insights on relationships. Here is a rough outline:

• A man is on his "path"
• The woman (or women) of his life is on her own "path"
• but they all share the experience of life together.
• Zan has never "broken" up with a girl,
• He has only "parted ways" and missed her dearly, but let her go on her path

When I saw Zan talk about this, it blew my mind. It was genius! I am extremely grateful I heard this before I got myself into a relationship. However, Dr. Paul says the exact same thing in his own system, and Dr. Paul's system is much more linear and science grounded. Dr. Paul says that every man has his-or-her own "boundary" (Boundary is a HUGE topic in MindOS and it would almost be impossible for me to write out the whole concept here. However the origin of the idea of boundary is nothing new, its very analogous to someone having "thin" versus "thick" skin when it comes to emotional trials).

So every person has a boundary (lets just call it skin). Someone with thin skin can't handle as much as one with thick skin---so it is basically well known a man of thin-skin cannot handle many problems. Well when that individual (or 2 individuals) with thin-skin get into a relationship, they start relying on each other for help when the other is suffering.

Say, for example, you are in college and receive a C+ in a class when you feel you deserved at least a B. Someone with thin skin may not handle this that well and start whining and complaining, cursing, regretting, and become envious of other students. Bad, bad, bad. If that guy had a girl friend and he was crying to her about his problems, he is basically giving his problems to her so she can resolve them for him---or dumping his problems on her.

Now that the girl friend has helped him, Great. The problem is gone and the man has moved on with his life. Unfortunately a bigger problem is present---the man is now Co-dependent on the woman. He relies on her to solve HIS own problems. His skin (or boundary) is now inside of her. What will he do if they break up. (Literally break up --- the "skin" will be torn when she leaves him). What will happen to the guy. Imagine that, losing part of your "skin" it takes years to heal.


The alternative. Above I listed a rough outline of Zan's ideal relationship. This is 100% the same as Dr. Paul's view. We need to learn to deal with our own problems and not rely on others (this comes down to what I wrote above about Anger and Anxiety). The idea of a relationship is not to have someone else deal with all your problems----The idea of a relationship is to share the great experiences of life with someone! This is called Inter-dependence.

There is SO MUCH more to this. Dr. Paul literally combines everything (all aspects of "self-help" psychology) into one source. Instead of going to Tony Robbins for courage, Anger Management for aggression issues, Weigh Watchers for impulsive-eating issues, and worse of all $1000000 on psychiatry bills for depression, everything is in Dr. Paul's MindOS!

All that I wrote about is just ONE aspect of the program, however it marks the most influencive to me as of now. There are 100s of other gems here.

Anyway, I still have the other half of the program to listen to before I am finished. Hopefully the next half will be as stimulating as the first.

Posted by BigSend on Monday, December 26, 2005 at 12/26/2005 04:17:00 PM | Permalink