http://bigsendworld.com

My situation with HB-Ai is interesting. It seems like she does like me, but I am falling into too many of her loops... very unintentionally.

She was supposed to join me at my roommate's jazz show, but she couldn't make it because her friends car got towed and she had to give her friend a ride. I knew the excuse was legitimate because she actually did help out her friend when she picked her up after class.

So Wednesday I was hoping to do something with her after class, but alas she calls me and says she is too sick to get to class and asks me to print out her journal. Yarrr!! So I agree and I was semi playful...


THEN, I go to the gym and see SUSEBOY! Remember, the Master PUA who works at my college. I told him the situation and he gave me some KILLER advice for phone-game. Thats his specialty too. He tells me to bust on her for everything and calibrate when she starts getting serious. (Very simplified).

Example from earlier:
She calls me as I'm hanging out with Richard and here is how the jist of the conversation goes:
Me: "Hey whats up"
Her: "Not much blah blah .... I'm working on this paper, what page in the book talks about Durkheim"
Me: "I don't know if I can tell you that, we need to work out my salary"
Her: "Omg etc etc etc blah blah"
Me: "Oh you're probably lounging on the beach, with a latte in one hand and laptop in the other and expect me to just print your stuff"
Her: "omg blah blah blah"

Eventually she started getting a bit pissed. She was tried of my sarcasm. The truth is, I was being a bit uncalibrated and being cocky funny when I should've have be more serious. Its as Mystery says: "when in comfort, drop the cocky, keep the funny"

So its not like Suseboy is wrong. What I did is much better than being some wussy-nice-guy who does everything for her. But I went from one end of the spectrum to the other. I need to calibrate down and get my comic timing.

So I learned this.

I think it could be over between me and her. I learned a lot from this because this is one of the first times I solidly got into comfort after attraction.

So I thank her for that, but now I need to get back on to sarging.

There is a chance she could still be down to be with me, but I just have this bad feeling. I already made a lot of mistakes, if I keep going then its going to be fool's mate if I hook up with her.



UPDATE:
(I wrote half of this yesterday, now the rest)

Since then I got back on the phone with her. I told her I was messing around, she shouldn't stress and that she is a smart girl (trying to calibrate).

But something messed up. I start getting more cocky/sarcastic as I feel I am getting more comfortable and she gets pissed again. I get a bad feeling.... she is either getting insulted by me being aloof and sarcastic or she is trying to control me.

Well I say, "okay, now I'll be serious, blah blah" and then SHE starts becoming sarcastic on the phone and that throws me off.

We end by disagreeing over some fact that happened in class. She says if I lose the argument I have to buy her lunch all week. If I win, I said she has to do the same. She said thats too much, so I was like "okay, how about 1 lunch and a massage"

And she was just like "No. Thats too personal".

Whoaa... fuck... that kind of hurt. Was she being sarcastic though?

"What do you mean by personal" (Pain in my chest...fuck I fell into her frame big time.. fuck fuck fuck!)

"Its too personal... I need to go drive my sister somewhere blah blah I'll call you later."


I haven't talked to her since. I ended up sending her an email and the next day a voice mail that I felt we were both lost in translation. That is, while she was being serious, I was joking around. While she was joking around, I was being serious.

So I said I felt the last conversation ended on a weird note and I think it was because we were both on different pages..


In retrospect sending that email and voice mail probably lowered my value you a lot (me chasing and falling frames etc etc). I don't know guys... emotions can fuck me up. Unfortunately I really liked this girl too much too soon.


So from my experience its probably over between me and Ai. Things were going SOO fucking good!! Then... she had to leave early on Monday didn't come in on Wednesday and now that weird phone call.

I FUCK UP THE SLIGHTEST IN THIS GAME AND BOOM!!
I lose a girl.

The truth is guys, This game is fucking horrible. The bull shit we have to go through drives some people insane. I read of monkey species that are the most peaceful and happy and one of the things they do is freely have sex all the time. All we humans need is happiness. Think about that guys..


Anyway, once I finally fucking figure out this game, get this part of my life handled, I will BE SO FUCKING RELIEVED!

If I were any type of natural, HB-Ai would be my girlfriend by now. She was giving me all the right IOIs, telling me how her friends would like me and shit, etc.



In truth there could be a chance she is still down. She may be going through some random shit in her life now and not have gotten back to me. I just feel a bad omen around this...


Sarge on guys.. And I gotta be 100% positive. I learned a LOT from this. However, I'm in a little low time now, so I may go home for the weekend and just relax and clear my head. Then get back into the game after that.

From what I hear, as I get better at this game, I will get with more girls into Deep Comfort... and I can't expect to !close all of them. This is me on my journey, slaying my dragons, fighting my daemons. I know eventually I will get this far with many women and somehow I may lose them as I learn the game.... I imagine I won't take it as hard next time.

In the end, I fucking know I will be one of THEE best pick up artists and then I see myself moving on to levels of Hypnotica, Steven P, Stephane, and the other spiritual gurus who fuck women in 3-somes, give women full-body orgasms, etc all the time. I dream about that shit... But here and now I still have my 2006 goals: Master A2 being one of them.


Thanks for reading guys... keep tuned as I am still excited on my journey!

Posted by BigSend on Thursday, February 09, 2006 at 2/09/2006 06:01:00 PM | Permalink