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If I were to ask most people what is wrong with them they would quickly and easily be able to give a rundown of all of their faults. Now, if I were to ask most people what their unique gifts are, they would stare at me with a blank look on their face.

Even if they were able to answer the question it would come after several minutes of thought. They are unsure of their gifts, natural abilities and unique qualities.

Ask yourself the following questions:

What do I like to do?

What are my unique gifts?

What are my passions?

What mark do I want to leave on the world?

How do I want to be remembered after I'm gone?

Put money aside when you are thinking about your mission because money isn't a factor. 'Do what you love and the money will follow' should be held in mind as you search for your mission. Remember, existence always rewards those who contribute to the world.

Make your mission about something that will be for the greater good of society. Make it something that is even greater than yourself. When you die, do you want your only contribution to be that you made tons of money for yourself? Or do you want to make a lasting mark on the world?

If you don't know your mission right now, make your mission about finding it. It might come easily to you or it might take some time to find out what you want to do with your life.

Once you have your unique qualities and what you are passionate about, you can now create a mission statement. Write it down. Writing your mission statement down makes it concrete and a reality for you instead of just an idea.

Make the choice to find your purpose today and separate yourself from the pack.

Labels: Outside Articles

This past weekend I've been up in Chicago shooting a gymnastic competition. The last 3 days have been ~13 hour days shooting something like 4600 gymnasts. It's been quite awesome actually. It's ridiculously cold up here! ...definitely not like Georgia. I LOVE the warm weather we have. There's constantly snow up here on the ground and when you breathe in through your mouth, it's like you're inhaling smoke because the air immediately chills the inside of your throat. Instead you gotta breathe through your nose, but it freezes your nosehairs.





heh, okay, so I've been playing with states of very intense love and peace lately. I've been falling in love with EVERYBODY. It's like Steph's post about how there's only one woman, but to me, there's only one being. In the eyes of everyone, I see consciousness, light, love, God, ME.





When I realized what was happening, I had a satori as to how to love everyone.





1) Fall MADLY in love with yourSELF.


2) Realize that everyone else IS you and that we are all one. Then, automatically, you fall in love with everyone else because they literally ARE you.





So, I just look people in the eye, like I'm looking straight into their soul, and I connect with them on this really deep level and radiate love out to them, to me.





Most people seem to really open up to this, both guys and girls.





For example, the other night we stopped by a drugstore to hit up the ATM. There was this really hot girl walking by so I made some comment about the SOUP she was carrying and she instantly blushed, giggled, and started falling in love with me. It was like the most natural thing in the world and I literally have no idea what I said. Even the words I said were totally irrelevant. It's pure energy.





She came by a few more times and we started talking a bit. It turns out she's an acrobat in town for some auto show. What kind of acrobat? An aerial acrobat. Yeah, I'd like to see an Ariel acrobat in action.





I noticed her accent and asked her where she was from and she said she was from Bulgaria so I asked her if she spoke russian, which she did, so I said something to her in russian.





I don't really remember what happened, but she was ahead of us in line and stayed after she paid and finished up so that she could keep talking to me. We spoke a little more and then I finished the conversation and headed out.





As we were leaving, my fellow photographer friends were like, "You know, you can invite her back to my room." The thing is though, that thought never even crossed my mind.





I was thinking about this today and had some eye-opening realizations.





I have this incredible amount of love towards people, but it's not a sexual type of love. While Steph sees the one yin woman in every woman, I literally see ME in every person... and you don't want to go around fucking yourself.





So yeah, even though to me I seems like a duality to break people up in terms of yin/yang, I do see the "problems" with not going with the polarity and want to start bringing more sexual energy into my heart energy.





Everything seems so beautiful. EVERYTHING! It could be a girl celebrating, a girl crying, an old man hobbling down the sidewalk, heck, even a fire extinguisher or the trash sitting at the bottom of the urinal. I'm literally falling in love with EVERYTHING!





The little girls I was shooting, they all do the same exact routines. They compete in floor, beams, bars, and vault, but we only shoot the first three. When they do floor exercises, they all use the same exact music. So you literally sit there and hear the same song over and over and over again all day long.





Now, I get tired of music fairly quickly, even my own music, and I'm not one to like to listen to ANYTHING that I'm even remotely tired of. Things are different now. It's like nothing angers me and nothing aggravates me.





I simply sit back into this state of intense peace and while the content of what's going on in the world might start to get mundane or repetitive, there's this underlying feeling of unshakable peace that is rock solid. It's really cool.





I hadn't drank in a while now and this weekend kicked back a couple beers with my buddies. It was really cool because I noticed something very amazing going on. I would drink very consciously in that I would watch the body start to get drunk, yet the consciousness that I am was totally unaffected. It made the difference between consciousness and the body as clear as night and day.





One of the photographers here, he must calibrate at the level of anger or something... he's one of the most pissed off guys I've ever met. I respect him as a photographer, but fuck, he constantly talks about killing people, murder, blood and death, how much things suck, etc.






I would sit back and talk to this guy from a state of compassion and utter amazement. It's like his perspective of the world is so radically beyond mine that he comes up with things that are completely outside the realm of my possibility... stuff like being a jerk on purpose to make people's lives miserable just because. It was like watching a fascinating show in the discovery channel... the human ego in action. It was interesting to watch this guy go without getting sucked into the ego madness. He'd typically look at me with this almost confused look because I wouldn't join him in the fuck-the-world mindset.





One thing I like about him though is that he definitely speaks his truth. Near the end of the trip, we were talking about different things people had said. During one of our lunch breaks, we went to grab a sub and after paying for it, I simply said "Thanks, beautiful" to the girl behind the counter. One of the photographers asked me if I flirt with every girl I meet and I just responded that I love everyone.





Anyways, the angry photog commented later on on how when I said that, it sounded almost out of place and that he couldn't tell if, by the way I was saying it, if I was saying that to a man or a woman.





That was really cool to hear coming from another person considering what I was saying earlier about loving everyone versus loving yin. Big realizations on that one. Plus it was cool to see the ego try to be embarrassed about it, yet having none of that actually come up. Embarrassment seems to only exist when you still care what other people think of you.





Everything seems so amusing now, so perfectly in place. Coming back from the shoot one evening, there were 2 lines waiting for shuttles to go back to the hotel, one for each of the two hotels running shuttles, both using the same bus. Anyways, a bus pulled past the only line that was there at the time and so we walked past the line towards the bus. At that moment, this one painbody yelled out, "Hey! There's a line here!"






I remember looking into this guy's eyes filled with anger and it was just so funny to me, to the point of absurdity. I looked over and saw that in fact, he had an accurate assessment of the situation. There was a line there. However, there was enough room on the bus to fit everyone in line several times over. Even so, it was just watching another ego go and do its thing.





The loving people bit is so transformational. Like, my roommate here in the hotel left to go shoot a cheer event in another state so another photographer came into take his place. Apparently when they create a new key, the invalidate the old ones so my key had been deactivated. Okay cool, no problem. So I go down to the front desk to get a replacement, but because my name wasn't on the register (business trip, not under my name), they wouldn't give me a key. The most they would do is have security escort me up if I could get the manager's approval.





So I speak to the manager and she starts to open up pretty quickly. People seem to really be so friendly and loving. I know they say reality is just perception, but man...





Anyways, while I'm waiting for security I go to sit down in the lobby, across from some other lady. I don't remember what I said to her, or to the few girls who came to sit down next to her, but the next thing I know, I literally have an entire gymnastics team practically jumping on top of me, pounding me with question after question trying to guess my name. It was hilarious... I would just sit back in my chair and look at each one of them one by one while sometimes giving them hints, sometimes changing the direction of the conversation entirely.





So anyways, these two massive guys in suits come by and one of them comes to escort me into my room. We chat for a bit and he turns out to be a pretty awesome guy. Even though he wasn't even allowed to let me into my own room, he did anyways and just walked off. It turns out that by the time we get there, my new roommate (who I'd already met previously and become friends with) was in the room and I could have just knocked and been let in so that whole security mess could have been avoided entirely.





It's a lot of fun though, coming from a place of TOTAL let go. Like, if shit goes down, it's cool. I just go with it and enjoy the ride, because there's always a series of events coming together where, when you go back and look at the big picture after the fact, you see how so many cool things lined up perfectly to make other cool things happen. At this point, I just trust that I'm creating the universe the way I want, even when stuff "seems" to be going "wrong".





One cool thing I really love doing is meeting people who the ego would either really respect, look up to, admire, etc. You know, people like celebrities, famous people, police, presidents, etc.





You know when kids are little, they look up to their parents as if they were Gods? It's a lot like that. The ego seems to naturally put people up on a pedestal, yet every time you meet one of the people who your ego placed on a pedestal, you come to realize each and every time that they're just as human as you are, with their own weakness, vulnerabilities, and imperfections. We're all just human, playing this game called life. There's no one amazingly better or worse than anyone else. We're all essentially equals on the level of beingness.





For example, during this meeting, I've had the opportunity to meet and hang out with photographers who I've heard about online and whose work and expertise I really respect... these people are pro sports shooters who shoot for virtually every professional sport you can think of... NBA, NFL, X-games, MLB, college sports, etc. etc.





No matter how "cool" they seem, they're still very much human. It's a very humbling experience.





One of the photographers I met who shoots pro tennis, golf, and baseball, he and I got to talking. It turns out he's read the Peaceful Warrior, seen the movie, is getting his son to watch the movie, has done the Course in Miracles, is getting into Eckhart Tolle... I'm like yeah buddy!





It's cool to meet others who are really into this same stuff here.





Lovingness isn't something you do. Like, by the end of the day, this body I have was starting to feel worn out and kinda cranky, so I wasn't particularly in the mood to intentionally do loving things to people like smile. Instead I'd just kinda go within to recharge and rest. So I'd walk around when we got a break and be totally still inside and out and still look at people while energetically radiating out love towards them and they would STILL open up and smile. I would literally have people stop and stare as I walked by, people remembering me day after day even though I hadn't said a single thing to them.





Love is about this field of energy that goes through you. It's this impersonal field of energy that touches everyone and everything around you. Other people may not consciously realize what's going on, yet they seem to get the fact that there's "something" going on here. Seriously... I would show no emotion or expression and the love would still reach them. Very cool.





I'm just rambling on here, but I really wanted to share some of these experiences with you guys. I gotta get some sleep to catch my flight back to Georgia tomorrow (err, today technically). If something else pops up that I want to share, I'll chime in later.





Thanks for reading the yakking.

Labels: Outside Articles, Spirituality

Labels: Commentary, Ideas, Outside Articles

I posted a LR+ a while back, and I think people were kind of surprised that I was getting blown out, maybe more surprised that I was talking openly about it and how I handle it. So I'm going to make this little piece right here all about blowouts so you can learn to use them to your advantage. If you missed the LR+, here's a link- Cold approaches in S. Florida: http://fastseduction.com/masf/24/352349/

Let me begin by pointing out that everyone is going to get blown out at some point. I don't care how good you are, no one can pick up every girl every time. I frequently see people who are aspiring PUAs do their thing, and it's obvious that they're still fearing the blowout. If you expect to be some kind of lady killer PUA zen master uber player, yet you still fear rejection and embarrassment, that's shows you're pretty naive about what it takes to succeed. Rejection and embarrassment are temporary conditions which go away very quickly. Being able to deal with situations that would be embarrassing to most people is a prerequisite to succeeding with women. If you're letting little things like embarrassment and social pressure stand in your way, you probably don't have the balls to attain massive success with women. Having balls is the #1 most important thing you need to succeed with women. If you're trying to be a big player there will be constant challenges on every lay and you need to be able to stand up to them. CONSTANT challenges. It never really lets up. You have to get used to it.

Even if you don't want to be a player, you just want to get a girlfriend and be happy, there will be CONTANT challenges. If you don't have balls, your GF is going turn you into her little bitch boy. That's just the way women are.

I hear people looking for openers and techniques that will open 100% of the time. Now this is just my opinion, but I think that can be a little counterproductive. Why? because for most guys, the search for that 100% open rate is a sign of fear. When you have fear you tend to play it safe. Women know you're playing it safe, and they can smell fear. Not attractive.

For other guys, this 100% opening thing is a sign of EGO. It's not about a true interaction with another person, it's about you and your skill set. That's not good. It's pretty self centered and it will prevent you from being genuine.

There are all kinds of women out there. Some are compatible with you and some are not. The goal of your opener should not be to get every girl to talk to you. The goal should be this: to find out as quickly as possible whether this girl is what you're looking for. Force the girl to show her true colors. You should be screening the girls and weeding out the incompatible ones as quickly as possible. If your purpose is to screen and evaluate the girl, that is something women pick up on. It's very attractive. It's a different motivation. You are not being motivated by fear of embarrassment You are not being motivated by ego or the need to prove that you can open any set. You are motivated by the confident belief that there are plenty women out whom you would click with, and it's just a matter of feeling a few girls out until you find one.

Are you feeling like if you blow this set or get blown out, it's going to ruin your night? Are you afraid if you blow the set 10 minutes in, you won't be able to attract another set? That's a really fragile way of thinking. You can not expect to succeed at this if you are truly that fragile. You need to develop a thick skin and create a set of stones for yourself.

There are 3 initial possibilities when you do an approach- attraction, blowout, or the 20 minutes go-nowhere set. Obviously attraction is the best option. But what about the other 2? Would you rather be blown out or would you rather have a 20 minute boring conversation that goes nowhere?

I'd rather get blown out. Getting blown out gives me 20 minutes of my life back. 20 minutes for me is really big. A lot can happen for me in 20 minutes. I can find a hotter girl, maybe a 3some, maybe run into an old friend. You never know. Even if I sit there doing nothing, I'll be plotting my next move and that will still be better than the 20 minute go-nowhere set.

I know you've been in that set. It just won't hook. You feel all tentative. The girl is giving you NOTHING. She's all quiet. She's totally boring. You stand there and plow material and get little reaction. You ask her questions and she gives one word answers. Her friends are looking at you funny. When that happens, the problem is not you, IT'S HER! Some girls are really super boring. Stay away from them.

Of course it depends what you're looking for. Some guys like mellower girls and so you might want to develop material that causes the high energy girls to not click with you. For me, I screen for humor, intelligence, and sexual energy in the first 30 seconds. If she's lacking any of those, I'm gone. I'm not wasting a few hours on a girl who doesn't know how to talk, laugh, and fuck. I'm gonna figure it out right away.

To get a bit more specific, I'm opening with things that will cause the girl to blow me out if she doesn't reach my requirements. Like horse girl, for example. A girl who isn't smart enough to grasp the subtly is going to say "Are you saying I look like a horse?" and blow me out. A girl who has no sense of humor is going to take me totally seriously and I'm gonna have to explain it 3 times. A girl who has a wounded inner child is going to look at me all scared cause she knows she wants to fuck me but she fears the cock. Get these girls away from me!

There are so many issued up girls out there. You have to filter them out. I swear like 60% of the hot early 20s girls I meet are on some form of psychiatric medication. Go away crazy girl!

Ok so filtering out crazy girls is a bit advanced. If you're just starting out, go ahead and do the 20 minute go nowhere sets once in a while. Maybe you'll learn something along the way. Go ahead and talk to the Prozac girls for now, but remember what I'm saying here, because the day will come when you are not in scarcity-land anymore and you'll become the selector.

Now, let's talk about the right way to blow out and have it work to your advantage.

DO NOT: Get all upset and walk away with your tail between your legs.

DO: Treat like a normal thing, where the girls did you a favor and saved you some time.

What most guys do is get embarrassed. Then everyone sees that and it plunges your value in the venue. Then you venue change and the cycle begins again. This is not necessary. Embarrassment is a choice.

Remember, from a few feet away, a blowout doesn't really look like much. All it looks like is people who know each other talking, then one or both turn their attention to something else. So here's a few things you can do when it happens so you prevent that plunge in value.

1. Don't push. When they say "Nice meeting you" or whatever. Just say "Nice meeting you too." Then stay right where you are. Just turn your back on them and turn your attention elsewhere. You don't have to walk away. Just stay positive and relaxed. Maybe take the chair next to them and face away. Check the room for your next set. To any bystanders, this just looks like you were done talking. It doesn't look like rejection.

2. Plow and try to save the set. If the girls get hyped up and you can stay in the saddle for a bit, sometimes just showing that much courage creates attraction.

3. Do not even stop to think. Just turn directly to your right and immediately open the next girls you see with the exact same line you were just using. This prevents you from starting a cycle of negative thoughts. Most of the time the same line works fine on the next set of girls. That proves that the problem wasn't you and you don't even have to break stride. This is something even newbies can do. It's really easy.

Some would consider this all an issue of inner game. To me, inner game is created by consistent action. That's why I'm telling your specifically what do do and how to behave in the situation. Your inner game will become consistent with your behavior as the behavior becomes habitual.

In the end, this is how I look at it: The goal is not to open every set. The goal is to get laid. If I get blown out 9 times and then get laid, it's a successful night. The best way to get laid is to screen girls, open with high impact material, and let the boring girls filter themselves out. I fully expect to get blown out 20% of my sets, and if I am not getting that, I take it as an indication that I'm not gaming hard enough. I'm playing it too safe. Any of you who end up sarging with me or learning from me will watch me get blown out and I'm not ashamed. The flipside is that the girls who don't blow me out usually get massively attracted in the first 30 seconds. I'll take those odds. I'll take 80% attracted over 100% opened but not attracted.

The nice thing about this is you can get a strong sexual response very quickly, and this often leads to some really fast lays. I like that. That's why I always say- BLOW ME OR BLOW ME OUT! I really don't care if I get blown out. One of my natural friends The Pheromone Kid always told me- "There's probably another girl who looks just like her right down the block."

I'm just not into the idle chit chat about guys in pleated pants vs. non-pleated pants. That stuff is cool for those who are just starting out, and props to the guys who came up with it back in the day, but there comes a time to push yourself and go for what you really want. A time to leave embarrassment behind forever. That's when you know you've really got some balls and you're really going to succeed with your goals.

I don't expect everyone to agree with this methodology, but I hope it makes a positive contribution to your game.


Brad P.

Labels: Outside Articles